Chapter 10: Setback

The next time I awoke, I was in my own familiar, canopy bed. I buried my face in the fluffy pillow and took a slow, deep breath.

“Nngh, gck… UUUUUUUUUUGH…!”

I let out a muffled scream into my pillow, but no matter how much I yelled, the bitterness sunk deep in my heart wouldn’t disappear.

What kept welling up from the depths of my chest was the bitter reality that I had been utterly defeated by the four of them.

My body felt as heavy as lead, and my head was a jumbled mess, my thoughts refusing to come together.

It was a despairing feeling—as if my entire worth had been shattered in an instant.

With my eyelids shut tight, I replayed the humiliating scene from that day over and over. What went wrong? Where did I misjudge? No matter how many times I went over it, I couldn’t find an answer.

Since then, I stopped going to the academy and shut myself in my room. Three days have already passed.

I didn’t even have the energy to get out of bed. Time just passed by emptily.

For meals, I’d only take a few bites of whatever Askii left in front of my door, and only when I felt like it.

It felt as if I alone had been cut off from the rest of the world.

Through a gap in my room’s curtains, I could see a sliver of light illuminating the dancing dust motes.

I felt as though every single one of those particles of light was mocking my pathetic state.

—And then, that evening.

BANG, BANG, BANG!

Suddenly, the sound of someone violently knocking on my door echoed through the room.

My body flinched at the rough sound, and I pulled the blanket up to my shoulders. My heart began to pound unpleasantly, a pulsing sound ringing in my ears.

…Who in the world is it?

“…What business could you have with a worthless woman like me, whose only assets are her magical power and good looks?”

My voice was a raspy whisper from under the bedsheets. It had no energy, and the words tasted like sand.

“You sound surprisingly energetic, don’t you?”

On the other side of the door, I could hear the familiar, exasperated voice of my maid, Askii.

There wasn’t a shred of gentle concern in her tone.

“A visitor has come for Michelle-sama. It is Carnelia-sama.”

I buried my face in the blanket and answered curtly.

“…Tell her I’m not here.”

I don’t want to see anyone right now. Especially not one of those four…

“Impossible. She’s already right outside.”

“Hah?!”

A short shriek escaped my lips.

Ugh… this maid is always like this. She never, ever listens to me. That frustration filled my chest.

Just then, there was a gentle knock at the door.

Knock, knock.

“Hellooo? Michelle, are you in there?”

The voice that called through the door was bright, yet tinged with a hint of worry.

Hearing Carnelia’s voice right now gave me incredibly mixed feelings.

I curled up in my blanket and held my breath, trying to erase my own presence as if I didn’t exist.

“Are you okay? You haven’t been to the academy at all. You always were one to shut yourself away when something bad happens. Elena-chan was worried about you, you know?”

At Carnelia’s words, I bit my lip.

——Elena.

Just hearing that name made my heart ache sharply. It felt as if my one and only source of pride had been stolen by my own sister, and my heart was being eaten away by jealousy and inferiority.

Carnelia’s voice was filled with genuine concern for me, which, in turn, only made my heart ache more.

“Hmm, no good, huh. Well, just to let you know, there’s a dungeon expedition in a week, and if you don’t go, you’ll have to repeat the year. …This is a get-well gift. I’ll leave it with Askii-san, okay?”

With that, the sound of footsteps on the other side of the door faded away. Then, I heard a soft rustle and sensed that something had been placed at the bottom of the door.

It was probably an apple pie from our usual shop. I felt like I could faintly smell its sweet scent even through the door.

My life as a shut-in entered its fourth day.

The demon known as boredom began to slowly but surely eat away at my mind.

I was getting tired of just lazing about in bed.

Counting the patterns on the ceiling, watching the way the dust danced. There was no more novelty in any of it.

…At this rate… I’ll really become a woman with no value at all…

The weariness that enveloped my entire body, and the powerlessness of being unable to do anything. It was all dragging me deeper into a swamp.

…I’m bored.

I rolled over and suddenly thought, maybe I’ll go for a little walk to clear my head.

But I immediately reconsidered. If a maid saw me, they would obviously start a fuss, worrying about me and all that.

Askii, especially, is always fussing over me.

Still, I couldn’t stand this boredom.