I Fell in Love with Someone I Shouldn't Have Fallen in Love with - Chapter 6

Little Sister’s Advice

I’m devastated by Emi’s words.

“Do you want to go out with senpai? Do you want to date him?”

“No, that’s not it! I don’t want to date him! But…”

“But…?”

“But…I want to stay by his side…I want to talk to him…”

“Yeah.”

“And then…”

Eh…

I want to be Souji-kun’s lover after all…

“You want to monopolize Souji-kun? You want to make him exclusively yours?”

“……”

“Ando-senpai is very handsome, an honour student, and very popular with the girls, so of course you would feel superior if you have someone like that by your side and always being together. I also feel the same way. However, that’s only for your own selfish convenience, for senpai, that might be annoying.”

“T-That’s not true…Souji-kun said that he is grateful to me…he also said that he enjoys being with me.”

“As friends, right? Have you ever thought of the reason why Senpai is distancing himself from you is perhaps because he knows that you like him and bothered by it?”

“So, you’re saying that it is because I fell in love with Souji-kun that he is distancing himself from me!? It’s because I fell in love with Souji-kun that he hates me!?”

“No, it’s not like that. It’s not like he hates you, Onee-chan. He considers you as his important friend, so I think he has no choice but to do so.”

“Even if you say that, I can’t help it since I’ve fallen in love with Souji-kun!”

“Still, those are Onee-chan’s personal and one-sided feelings…Both Onee-chan and I should never fall in love with senpai…”

“Why!? I just don’t know what to do anymore…”

“It’s just how it is. If you need a reason, you can always think of it on your own. Anything will do. Such as Senpai not having time for romance, having a traumatic past experience with love, or you being the daughter of a mom who has issues with senpai…”

“If you say so…”

Should I just give up…?

However, I can’t accept it at all.

In the first place,

“How do you know so much about this, Emi? How can you talk like you know exactly how Souji-kun feels?”

“T-That’s…”

“Did Souji-kun tell you about it? Does Souji-kun like Emi more than me?”

“No, that’s not true! That’s definitely not the case! There is absolutely no doubt that Senpai cares so much about you!”

“How can you say that?”

“I can tell just by watching the two of you. I’ve seen the two of you together a lot. I’ve been watching the two of you more closely than anyone else. Anyway, even if you might not be able to accept it right now, try to calm down a bit. Right now, you are putting your own feelings first and not considering Senpai’s feelings. You weren’t like that before were you, Onee-chan? You used to think about his feelings that avoid doing things that he doesn’t like, right?”

That’s right.

I used to think about how to keep my distance with Souji-kun and consciously set boundaries.

“I understand…”

Until Emi reminded me just now, I had forgotten that I used to consider Souji-kun’s situation and feelings first before mine.

Somewhere along the way, I got carried away.

I acted like we are a couple even though we’re not.

I felt dissatisfied and got depressed on my own.

However, the current me don’t have the confidence to act the way I did back then…

I can’t help but to feel anxious and restless.