I Fell in Love with Someone I Shouldn't Have Fallen in Love with - Chapter 8

Change of Heart

Even after Souji-kun won the election and became the student council president, he still seems to spend his time reading in the library after school.

Whenever I go to the library to grab some materials for my club activity, I always see him sitting on the same spot.

However, unlike before, now that he is the famous student council president, he is often approached by students in the library.

On the other hand, our relationship remains the same, we still never make eye contact at school and rarely talk to each other at home.

Sometimes when we leave the house at the same time in the morning, we would only greet each other with a simple ‘Good morning’ and Souji-kun would go ahead by himself.

Not only Souji-kun is the student council president, he also excels academically.

In the midterm exams, which are the first regular exams of our third year, Souji-kun ranks first in our grade.

Our school usually doesn’t publicly disclose individual rankings, but since he came first in our grade, it became of topic of conversation in our class, and I came to know about it as well.

By the way, I’m somewhere slightly above the middle in the grade ranking.

When I get home, my mom scolded me a bit and told me to study harder, but fortunately, she doesn’t seem to be aware of Souji-kun’s grades, so she didn’t compare my grades to Souji-kun’s. I feel relieved.

As I lay in my bed, I think about Souji-kun.

Lately, I’ve been thinking about Souji-kun all the time.

He is left alone in this world after his only parent, his mother, passed away.

Even though our family is taking care of him, he is being treated very coldly at home.

At school, he doesn’t participate in club activities because of financial reasons and became student body president instead.

He ranks first in the midterm exams.

He has a very handsome face, nearly 180 centimetres tall, and rumor has it that he is quite athletic as well.

Despite his complicated circumstances, he is able to do all of that.

I’ve never heard anyone at school talk bad or envy him.

I initially found him quite annoying and asked him to keep quiet about our living situation, as he is so much more talented than me and attracted the attention of many of our classmates.

At first, I regretted telling Souji-kun to not tell anyone that we are living together, but now I’m glad I did.

I felt that I’m too small-minded and insensitive about Souji-kun’s circumstance, but now I’m afraid if someone in our class know that we are living together, things can get out of control.

I still can’t get his gentle smile out of my head.

Souji-kun doesn’t have silly problems and worries like I do, he is struggling with real problems.

About his late mother, about what he is going to do after he graduates high school, about finances, about food.

Looking at Soji-kun makes my heart throb, but at the same time, I feel a sense of guilt deep within my heart that I can’t do anything about it.

He excels in everything he does at school, but yet at home, no one praises him. Perhaps, they are not even interested to.

I feel so ashamed and miserable that I can’t do anything to help Souji-kun.

There is no doubt…

I’m sure that I’m in love with Souji-kun.

However, at the same time, I’m embarrassed of my attitude and the words I said to Souji-kun.

What a miserable and pathetic love.