I Don’t Want to Die as a Mob in My Second Life! ～A Story Where I Kept Training from Inside the Womb and Ended Up Being Mistaken for a Monster～ - Chapter 20: The Sideboob Pig Arrives ← Forget That, What About Hihiirokane!?

Chapter 20: The Sideboob Pig Arrives ← Forget That, What About Hihiirokane!?

“Ah, what a lovely morning.”

The day after the chaos with the sisters.

Carefully getting out of bed to avoid waking the trio of Conceptual Spirits snoozing away in the futon, I opened the curtains to let the bright morning sunlight flood in.

The warmth of the sun really is comforting. My second-life body may be tough enough to endure it, but I’ve had enough of freezing, desolate worlds for now.

“Alright, time to start another day of training… wait, huh?”

Something felt off as I looked out the window.

A wide garden perfect for training, koi lazily swimming in the pond, Dad’s Conceptual Spirit, Dove, napping in the trees while a stray cat eyed it hungrily—so far, so normal.

But beyond the front gate… who was that woman sweeping the area in front of the house?

“Oh my, what a beautiful young lady! Are you one of the Soranaki family’s servants?”

“Ah, um, well, it’s not exactly like that…”

“I don’t care what it is, but don’t let too much of your sideboob show! You’re unnecessarily big, and it’s sticking out of your apron! What if that infamous kid attacks you!?”

“Ehhh!?”

…A mysterious woman, now tangled up in conversation with a neighborhood auntie.

I couldn’t see her face, but her silhouette alone was unmistakable.

That light-blue hair, bordering on aqua, and the sideboob so prominent it’s visible even from behind—it could only be one person.

“Setsuna Kirisame?” 

Why is she cleaning our house?”

◆　◇　◆

“You’re the one who suggested it in the first place!”

“Geez, you’re loud…”

After noticing her, I walked over and casually asked, “What are you doing?” And she immediately started yelling at me.

For the record, the neighborhood auntie ran off the moment she saw me, shouting, “Ahh, you young folks take your time!” as she fled.

It stung a little. Looks like people still think I’m some kind of villain. Maybe I should do some rounds in the neighborhood to improve my image?

“Hey, are you even listening, Kanata!?”

Yes, yes, I hear you.

“By the way, the apron dress suits you, Miss Setsuna.”

“I-I wasn’t asking for your opinion on my outfit!”

Wow, she glared daggers at me.

It’s hard to believe this woman is supposed to become the ‘Ice Queen.’ Right now, she’s more like a yappy little chihuahua in human form.

“Still, I can’t believe you’re actually cleaning our house, Miss Setsuna. I was joking, you know.”

“Wait, that was a joke!?”

“Of course it was.”

No way would I seriously put a noblewoman from the prestigious Kirisame family to work like that.

“Which is why I’m surprised you actually went through with it. Didn’t anyone stop you? Especially the head of your family, Kagero?”

“Ugh…”

The moment I mentioned his name, Setsuna clammed up. What’s that about?

“Apparently, regarding what happened with Sharo and me, Grandpa Kagero and your father, Mr. Michitaka, had a private discussion…”

Ah, now that she mentioned it, Dad did leave the house late last night. I just went straight to sleep after that.

“And?”

“And… Mr. Michitaka said, ‘It’s disgraceful for a parent to make a fuss when the son has already forgiven everything.’ So, they decided to let the matter go.”

Wow. Dad’s really grown.

The timid Dad from not too long ago wouldn’t have been able to say a word in front of the old head of a prestigious family.

“Grandpa agreed, so they decided to officially brush it under the rug. However, as for me… Grandpa told me to reflect on my actions…”

Ah, I see. So as a sign of reflection, they sent her here as a housemaid.

“…So, for the next week or so, I, Setsuna Kirisame, will be working as a live-in maid for your household. Please take care of me… ugh…”

Setsuna reluctantly bowed her head, clearly unhappy about the situation.

Huh. Who would’ve thought that the future top lady of the Spirit Conductor world would end up playing the role of a maid?

This second life of mine really is complete chaos.

“By the way, Kanata!”

Hmm? What now, Setsuna?

“I-I’ll have you know, if you try anything improper, I’ll be very angry!”

I’m not going to. Don’t say something so ridiculous.

“—Wait, or is it that you want me to try something, pig?”

“Hyaaaaah!?”

My body had said something rude again, but instead of getting angry, Setsuna let out a strange sound.

What’s with this woman…?

◆　◇　◆

So, by late morning: After devouring ten bowls of Maro’s delicious breakfast curry (he had said, “You’re just going to train endlessly anyway, so eat up”), I stepped into the garden.

Today, not only Dad but also Setsuna was joining as my supervisor.

When I asked her, she’d given me a skeptical look and said, “Wait, you want to get even stronger?” But she reluctantly agreed.

“By the way, Miss Setsuna, where’s your sister, Miss Sharo? I invited her to train with us.”

“Oh, Grandpa approved of that. She should be on her way… ah, there she is.”

Following Setsuna’s gaze, I spotted Sharo hopping across the rooftops of nearby houses, shouting “goja goja” as she made her way over.

As expected of a user of the [Ninja] Conceptual Spirit. Her movements, likely enhanced by spiritual power, were surprisingly agile.

“Kanata, I’m here ya! …Wait, wahahaha! Big Sis Setsuna, you’re actually dressed as a maid, de gojaru! Wahahahahaha! Ahhhh!”

…Sharo collapsed in the garden, laughing like an idiot.

She was literally rolling around on the ground, clutching her sides.

Sigh. At this rate, it’s no wonder she ends up like peeled shrimp in the future. What a hopeless little brat.

“Come on, Kanata, laugh with me~!”

“I’m not laughing.”

Let’s not forget, the reason Setsuna came charging in the first place was because of you. So what exactly are you laughing at?

“Ugh… Sharo… you’re still such a little brat…!”

And there it is. Setsuna, her face bright red, looking down while shaking her fists.

Is she going to snap?

“But I still loooove youuuuuuuu!”

“Seriously?”

Instead of yelling, she loudly declared her love.

This sister complex is something else… what a lost cause.

“Let me guess, the reason your sister’s like that is because you spoiled her too much, isn’t it?”

“Hmph! That’s one perspective, I suppose!”

That’s the only perspective.

And now she’s sniffing her sister’s head… seriously?

“…Father, let’s just leave these two alone and start training.”

“Oh, uh, yeah. You’ve got some impressive ignoring skills, Kanata…”

Meanwhile, Setsuna started licking Sharo’s ear.

I averted my gaze from this ridiculous shrimp-brat and sideboob pig interaction. Dad cleared his throat with a cough and, with his Conceptual Spirit [Dove] perched on his shoulder, began speaking.

“Today’s training will focus on Curse Wielding. It’s one of the most difficult techniques in Spirit Conduction.”

“That’s true. It’s also the one I struggle with the most.”

Curse Wielding—this technique uses the negative aspects of a Conceptual Spirit to affect an opponent.

To put it simply, it’s like cursing someone. Think of it as inflicting status ailments in a game.

“Let’s review the basics. For example, my Conceptual Spirit, [Dove]. Unlike city birds like crows, doves are often considered ‘not very intelligent.’”

Ah, yeah, they’re famous for making nests that look like someone just threw together three sticks.

“So, if you were to forcibly impose [Dove] onto someone, the effects would be things like ‘slower thinking’ and ‘reduced judgment.’”

“Coo-coo!”

Pretty terrifying effects. Meanwhile, the Spirit itself just looks clueless, making silly noises like that.

“However, it’s a difficult technique to use. If your target has spiritual energy, they can resist it. It works similarly to Spirit Hosting.”

Spirit Hosting—a technique where a Spirit’s soul is enveloped and stabilized within your own spiritual energy.

If the Spirit shakes your soul enough to break through that spiritual barrier, the technique fails.

“When a target’s soul resists, it sharpens its spiritual energy into a blade that can cut into the spiritual membrane used in Curse Wielding. So, if you want to keep the curse active, you have to continuously pour in your own spiritual energy and adjust it to match the shape of the target’s soul.”

What a tedious technique.

The other day, I managed to take over that ice samurai statue using [Doll], but that was only possible because it wasn’t a living being.

If I were up against a human or a Conceptual Spirit with a soul, they’d resist with everything they had.

“It’s probably faster to just take out the opponent directly.”

“Haha, true. But in a high-stakes fight, even dulling your opponent’s senses for a few seconds can make a huge difference. Plus, it’s essential for missions involving capturing Mediums or rare Conceptual Spirits, so it’s worth mastering.”

That made sense. A Reisoushi’s job isn’t just about eliminating threats.

“Alright, let’s get started, Kanata. …But, uh, go easy on me, okay?”

Dad gave me a wry smile.

Since Curse Wielding involves “targeting someone,” you need a live test subject.

Naturally, that meant my practice target was going to be Dad.

“Lick-lick-lick!”

“Sister, that tickles, you know~!”

…Meanwhile, the two disaster sisters were being all chummy next to us.

Even though they’re technically women, it feels wrong to use such a harsh technique on them.

Also, they’re noble daughters—well, technically.

“Hmm… (If only I had someone to test Curse Wielding on properly…)”

Just as that thought crossed my mind—

“―Ojya? Ojyoo? Ojyaaa!?”

From the direction of the house, a strange “Ojya, ojya” sound echoed.

Was that Maro? What’s going on?

“Listen up, everyone! I bring great newss!”

Maro came over, holding his phone and grinning from ear to ear.

“What is it, Mr. Maro?”

“Prepare to be amazed! Just now, I received a call from the Spirit Conductor Agency headquarters!”

With a sharp motion, Maro held out his phone.

Displayed on the screen was the image of a massive, blazing steel giant crushing trees underfoot as it walked.

“Nearby, in a corner of the Chichibu Mountains here in Saitama, the legendary metal Hihiirokane’s Conceptual Spirit has appeared! If we can capture it and make it produce metal, it will undoubtedly boost Japan’s national strength!”

Ohh!?

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[Tips]

Hihiirokane:

A mythical metal mentioned in religious apocrypha.

Said to be lighter than gold, harder than diamonds, impervious to deterioration, and to emit a shimmering crimson glow. It is also described as having extremely high thermal conductivity and being immune to all magnetic forces—properties that defy the laws of physics.

Conceptual Spirit of [Hihiirokane]:

A giant-shaped Conceptual Spirit that appears in mountainous regions.

It has surfaced multiple times around the world, but no one has managed to capture it.

Instead, it leaves a trail of destruction, killing humans to its satisfaction before vanishing.

Neighborhood Auntie:

A chatty woman with a penchant for gossip. Her lack of tact is almost endearing.

She’s wary of Kanata Soranaki, saying things like:

“His face is so handsome, but he’s definitely evil. He reminds me of the top host who swept me off my feet in my younger days! One touch, and you’ll get burned!”

Her overly romantic imagination keeps her at a safe distance from him.

Apron Dress:

The type of apron often worn by maids.

Setsuna is wearing one over her usual sideboob-revealing kimono.

Although the apron is generously sized, it still fails to cover her overly ample sideboob, giving her the appearance of a pregnant pig. A valiant but futile effort.

Maro:

While returning from shopping, he chatted with a group of neighborhood aunties who pointed at him, exclaiming, “Oh my, a wild Heian aristocrat!”

Despite their crude remarks, Maro finds their casual city gossip amusing and enjoyable.

As a member of the prominent Godaiin family, he is particularly thrilled by the appearance of Hihiirokane’s Conceptual Spirit.

As for the arrival of Sharo and Setsuna, Maro sighed, muttering:

“The Soranaki family sure attracts strange people, de ojaru.”

He remains blissfully unaware that his white-faced Heian-style appearance is just as eccentric.

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Training Arc: Almost Done!