I Decided to Abandon the Traitors Who Planned to Use and Dispose of Me, the Hero, at the Last Moment. - Chapter 04: Too Late for Regret—The Saintess on the Guillotine

Chapter 04: Too Late for Regret—The Saintess on the Guillotine

From as far back as I can remember, I was raised by the church. I never knew my parents’ faces or even their names, but I never felt sad about it.

The teachings of the church—to worship the goddess and help the weak—felt right to me, and life in the church was fulfilling. As long as I had the name Cecilia, I felt I needed nothing else.

My journey outside the church began when I received a divine revelation during the war between the kingdom and the demons. It was considered a great honor, and the church leaders praised me highly as they sent me off with much fanfare.

When the “hero,” Elliot, came to welcome me as the healer of the hero’s party, he was a calm and mature boy for his age. I found him quite likable. Marle, the talkative and lively mage, and Hilde, the brave and loyal swordswoman, joined us, making the journey an exciting experience full of new sights, sounds, and adventures.

The constant presence of battle, war, and death was terrifying at times, but the friendship with my fellow women and the slowly growing feelings of affection I had for Elliot made every day a joy.

—But as we fought against the Demon Lord’s army and returned to the capital to report our victories, I found myself giving in to the prince of the kingdom, Netrik, and offering him my body.

At first, the prince approached me under the pretense of offering advice on my feelings for Elliot. 

Looking back, I realize now that he was skilled in manipulating women. Before I knew it, I had fallen into the pleasure he provided. My feelings for Elliot gradually faded, replaced by my infatuation with the prince’s sweet promises of the future whispered in our private moments. I started to believe in a plan to eliminate Elliot.

I soon learned that I wasn’t the only one. The other two women in the party, Marle and Hilde, had also become involved with the prince. Sometimes, the three or even four of us shared his affection. Elliot was the only one left in the dark, unaware of what was happening within his own party.

…Marle, Hilde, and I became bound by the same secret, sharing the same goal.

During all of this, we discovered that the war had been caused by the prince’s cruel acts of kidnapping demon girls and selling them. But I was so captivated by the prince’s love that I didn’t care. I didn’t report it to the church and instead buried the information, keeping it to myself.

Around the time of our shift in loyalty, a new member joined the party. His name was Thorn, a “warrior.” He was a strange boy with unusual knowledge and seemed to be about the same age as Elliot. When asked where he came from, he mentioned a place called Nihon no Tōkyō (Tokyo, Japan), a name none of us had ever heard of. Perhaps he was from another continent.

Thorn quickly became friends with Elliot, but he seemed to keep a certain distance from the three of us women, as though there was an invisible barrier between us.

To be honest, I was afraid of Thorn. It felt as though he could see right through the betrayal in our hearts—the plan to eliminate Elliot after defeating the Demon Lord. The other two didn’t seem to sense anything off about Thorn, so it might have just been my intuition.

When I subtly mentioned my concerns to the prince, he thought for a moment before assuring me that he would handle Thorn. He caressed my body and passionately loved me afterward, which made all my worries disappear. I became convinced that as long as I followed the prince, nothing could go wrong.

Thorn eventually achieved incredible feats, defeating one of the Demon Lord’s Ten Generals, the “Enchanter,” and even taking the right eye of Impactor, the strongest of the Ten Generals and his close friend. 

Thorn fought alongside Elliot as one of the two pillars of the hero’s party, and after that incident, he became Impactor’s rival, engaging in many battles with him. However, just before our assault on the Demon Lord’s castle, Thorn faced Impactor in a one-on-one duel during a mission and was gravely injured, left unable to fight as a warrior.

—And I was the only one who realized the truth: this outcome was the result of the prince’s interference and schemes.

“Why, Thorn!? After all the battles we’ve fought, after everything between us… this can’t be how it ends!”

“…Regretful, isn’t it?”

As I watched Impactor rage over the unsatisfactory end to their fight, and Thorn collapse with a massive hole in his torso, losing consciousness, I was overwhelmed with deep regret. I had tainted the honorable duel between two warriors, between two men. 

…This was my fault. 

To the rest of the hero’s party, who were unaware of the truth, it seemed like an unfortunate accident. But I alone knew that this was the prince’s doing, and it was I who had caused this outcome.

Desperately, I treated Thorn, using all the power of the blessing I had received, and I was able to save his life. However, the damage and lasting effects of his injuries meant that Thorn could never fight the way he once did. 

From then on, he called himself a “rogue.”

In the end, Impactor left with a roar of anger and, surprisingly, never reappeared in our battles against the Demon Lord’s army. Perhaps the fact that he could never settle his rivalry with Thorn made him lose interest in the war altogether. If so, it was a small blessing amid all the misfortune.

Since Thorn could no longer fight, we suggested he leave the party, but he stubbornly refused, saying he couldn’t abandon Elliot. He stayed with us, carrying supplies and continuing on the journey. 

Marle secretly mocked him, calling him a powerless, useless piece of trash, a parasite clinging pathetically to the hero’s party. Hilde joined in on the ridicule. But I couldn’t bring myself to laugh with them because I knew it was my fault Thorn had ended up this way. Guilt weighed on me, making it impossible to join their scorn.

—And then, just before we were about to defeat the Demon Lord, our betrayal and plot were exposed.

Seeing myself entwined with the prince in those indecent scenes made shame and regret threaten to crush me. For the first time—no, finally—I forced myself to look directly into Elliot’s eyes.

Those eyes, once bright and full of life, were now dark and hollow, like the deepest night. They were like the eyes of a dead fish, devoid of any emotion. 

We had done this. We had killed Elliot’s spirit. And I realized that Thorn had stayed with us, enduring our mockery, all to avoid leaving Elliot alone.

We were scum, the lowest of the low, filthy beyond redemption.

At that moment, I finally realized the depth of the horrible deeds we had committed. Desperate, I pleaded with Elliot to slay the Demon Lord, offering everything I had to make amends. But he refused to listen, and all we could do was retreat, dragging the armless Hilde with us.

When we returned to the kingdom, what awaited us was nothing but anger, scorn, insults, and the lowest possible treatment. I was summoned by the church, where the archbishop personally declared my excommunication and condemned my actions as a betrayal of all humanity.

“You fool! You are no priestess, but a disgrace! Use your remaining life to heal the soldiers fighting against the Demon Lord’s army until your final breath!”

I couldn’t argue with the archbishop’s harsh words; I could only nod in shame.

In regret and despair, I headed to the front lines, where I reunited with Hilde, who now wore prosthetic arms and could barely speak, and Marle, who continued to rant in anger against Elliot and the prince. 

Hilde’s pitiful state was unbearable, so I tried to talk to her, hoping to restore some of her sanity.

We were sent into a fierce battle, and thanks to Hilde’s incredible fighting skills, we managed to gain the upper hand—at least for a while.

…But that was only until the Demon Lord’s generals arrived. 

Hilde began fighting one of the generals, the one who could slice through soldiers with just a snap of his fingers. Then we heard that Red Shadow, the assassin, had also arrived. I was speechless. Never before had two of the Demon Lord’s generals appeared on the same battlefield. To fight them without Elliot or Thorn was as good as a death sentence.

“—Cecilia! Healing magic!!!”

It was Marle calling out to me. I realized she had grabbed my hand and was casting an attack spell on both of us, trying to escape the battlefield. Facing Red Shadow, who could assassinate without leaving a trace, she knew that casting an area attack spell on ourselves was better defense than any regular protective magic. She understood that if Red Shadow got too close, it would be over.

…But Hilde was still fighting.

She was clashing head-on with Marvellous, one of the Demon Lord’s generals, shielding us, even if she seemed crazed. I could see that, in her own way, Hilde was trying to protect us. I didn’t want to abandon her—but Marle didn’t give me a choice. She grabbed my hand, launching a series of jump and teleportation spells to escape. As the battlefield grew smaller in the distance, I saw Hilde finally being cut in half. Under Marle’s urging, I cast healing magic on us. 

…I’m so sorry, Hilde. You were trying to protect us…

At that moment, I felt something strange around my neck, and a gasp escaped my lips.

“Ah—”

As my vision spun, I saw Marle flying away, having grabbed my body just moments before. It was only then that I realized Red Shadow had already severed my head. But it was too late.

No, this was only fitting. I had indulged in fleeting pleasures and desires, betrayed the hero, and conspired against the world. It was only natural that this would be my fate. As the ground rushed up to meet me, all I could do was regret my actions.

I’m sorry, Elliot. I’m sorry, Thorn. And I’m sorry, Goddess. I abandoned the role I was given and betrayed all of humanity. This is the rightful punishment for my sins—a traitor deserves nothing less than to lose their head.

My final wish is that in the battles to come, innocent lives will be spared. Oh, Goddess, I don’t seek forgiveness for myself or for us. We committed unforgivable acts. But please, please, let the innocent be saved. Have mercy, have mercy, have mercy, have mercy, have mercy, have mercy, have mercy, have mercy, have mercy, have mercy, have mercy, have mercy, have mercy, have mercy, have mercy, have mercy…

―And so, I prayed until my last moment, until a dull thud and the impact of the ground ended my consciousness.