Chapter 15 – Leo Shidora

Where did those two who vanished go?

And why did Nao-chan leave the paper bag with the underwear behind? At this rate, it looks exactly like I bought it.

Normally, it’d probably be better not to move from this spot since they might come back, but as expected, that’s impossible. Even just now, a lady coming out of the lingerie shop stared a hole through me. She looked at the paper bag in my hands, then at my face, and gave me a smiling nod like, “Yep, yep. Good for you.”

That’s not it. I don’t have a crossdressing fetish. Though if that lady is saying she wants to make me wear it and play a little prank on me, I might consider it. No, lie. Impossible.

Now then, enough thinking about stupid things — time to move, time to move.

So I decided to come to the food court for now. It’s wide open here, so I figured it’d be easy to spot them. Plus, I can technically still see the lingerie shop from earlier, even if it’s a bit far away.

Come to think of it, I passed in front of Anime Saito on the way here… It was amazing.

Like middle-aged women swarming a bargain sale, young maidens were surging toward the cash registers with desperate looks on their faces.

I guess some kind of merch for fujoshi must have come out? Not that I’m interested.

While waiting, I ordered fries at a fast-food joint and furiously munched away. I washed them down with cola and munched some more.

“They really aren’t coming back. Seriously, where did they go?”

Just as I muttered that, I caught sight of Nao-chan running while looking around restlessly. Looks like she’s searching for me. Even so, she has such a grim expression.

Ah, looks like she noticed me — wait, eh!?

“Come.”

The moment she noticed me, she pushed through the crowd, dashed right up to me, and grabbed my hand. S-So aggressive.

“Eh, what? What’s wrong?”

“There’s something… I want.”

“Something you want?”

“Never mind that, hurry! Quantities are limited to one per person! You must come as well!”

What is this? Does she turn into a Sengoku warlord when her emotions run high?

And it’s a limited-time offer? I wonder what it is.

Dragged by the hand, the place I was brought to was Anime Saito. Right in front of me was a line filling the entire store. Everyone was holding clear files and acrylic keychains of a similar-looking character.

Hm? For some reason, I feel a weird sense of familiarity with this character…

“The thing you want is anime character merch?”

“What was that? Do not treat my beloved as a mere character! At this rate, that woman will once again… Kuh! That is the one thing I cannot allow…”

Whoa… She’s got it bad. This is that thing, right? Being seriously in love with a fictional character? I don’t really get it.

Well, whatever. If she says she wants it, I’ll tag along.

“Got it. So what should I buy?”

“This and this. I leave it to you! I shall get the same ones.”

“Eh? You’re buying the same ones?”

“Naturally.”

Naturally, she says… Amazing. It’s nothing but a complete waste.

And what exactly is it she wants so badly she’d go this far? Let’s see… hm?

“Leo Shidora? Huh? I feel like I’ve heard that somewhere before…”

“You! You know of Leo-kyun!?”

Leo-kyun? Leo… kyun?

Wait a minute. Leo Shidora is… eh? No, no! There’s no way! Eh? That’s a joke, right? Leo-kyun is THIS!? Is he not a real person?

Ah, looking closely at this, the clothes he’s wearing are the same crazy uniform Watase-san and Fujimiya-san made me wear before…

No wonder. I thought a school that made students wear a uniform like that had to be out of its mind.

Huh? Which means, the “boyfriend” Watase-san and Fujimiya-san were talking about is a 2D boyfriend? Just a delusional, cringe boyfriend? And they’re saying Ayane-san stole him away? What? What on earth did Ayane-san even do? I have absolutely no clue.

“What is the matter? Freezing up so suddenly.”

“…Nao-chan. This Leo Shidora isn’t a real person, right?”

“What are you saying? Leo-kyun is alive. Right here in my heart. He is always watching over me. Look.”

Saying that, Nao-chan showed me her smartphone’s lock screen. A flashy, blonde-haired guy was winking.

“See?”

Not “See?” — he’s not watching. He is absolutely not watching. First of all, he’s not alive. He’s flat. What goes on inside her head? I’ll have to consult Hidaka-san about this later. This is bad. She’s terminal.

“Look, the line has moved forward. Walk.”

“…………”

Still unconvinced, I moved forward — and from the speaker next to the life-sized Leo-kyun panel placed by the register, I heard this voice.

“The only sound I play is yours!”

………………

Umm… this is the catchphrase Nii-chan was saying before, isn’t it? And this… is Nii-chan’s voice, isn’t it?

— You’ve got to be kidding me.