Chapter 46 – A Rough Deal

【Elizabeth PoV】

Damn…I still can’t believe this punishment. Every minute away from Adriel feels like absolute torture.

I sit alone in the study room at Magus High, my mind replaying every mistake I had made in the past. I know I’ve messed up, but it still hurts too much.

Seda leans forward, her voice calm.

“I’m fine now, Elizabeth. That punishment helped me grow.”

I shake my head slowly.

“But it did nothing for me. I feel empty without him.”

Emma slams her fist on the table.

“Empty? That punishment was a joke! You barely got any real pain!”

I look down at my hands, feeling the weight of guilt.

“I thought facing a little loss would force me to change. Instead, I got off too easy.”

Emma’s eyes narrowed.

“If you’d really been punished, you’d have been forced to spend a whole month away from Adriel! Then you’d know how much you take him for granted.”

I swallow hard.

“I don’t want to lose him completely. But every moment apart makes me realize how careless I’ve been.”

Seda rests her hand gently on mine.

“Elizabeth, healing isn’t about being shattered. It’s about learning your lesson in your own way.”

I glance at Seda, then shift my eyes toward Emma.

“I keep replaying every moment—the fight, the jealousy. I see his hurt eyes, and it breaks me inside.”

Emma’s voice cuts in sharply.

“Then why aren’t you suffering more? You need to feel every bit of that pain so you’ll never take him for granted again!”

I lower my gaze.

“I’m scared, Emma. Too much pain might break me entirely…and push him even further away.”

Emma leans in, her tone almost icy.

“Exactly. That’s why you needed a harsher punishment. You have to learn your lesson through real loss.”

I bite my lip as tears well up inside me.

“I do want to change. I want to fix my mistakes. But I’m not sure I can handle being cut off from him for that long.”

Seda speaks softly.

“Elizabeth, growth happens in many ways. You don’t have to be destroyed to be reborn.”

I let out a shaky sigh.

“Maybe I need to feel the full weight of my actions. I thought a small task would be enough, but now I’m not so sure.”

Emma slams her hand down again.

“Your punishment was too light, Elizabeth! If you’d spent a full month away from him, you’d finally get it!”

I stare at the table, every word hitting like a punch.

“I…I know I’ve been careless. I hurt Adriel. I’m haunted by that every day. But if the punishment is too harsh, I might end up broken.”

Emma’s gaze hardens.

“Then you’ll need those scars! They’ll remind you of your failures—so you never repeat them.”

I close my eyes, feeling her words mix with my fear.

“I don’t want scars that remind me of pain. I want to change without falling apart every day.”

Seda squeezes my hand.

“Change doesn’t have to come from destruction. Sometimes, it comes from understanding—and slowly fixing what’s broken.”

I try to steady my voice.

“I keep thinking if I had suffered more, I’d finally understand how much I took him for granted. But the thought of a whole month without Adriel…it’s unbearable.”

Emma locks eyes with me, her expression fierce.

“Then listen carefully, Elizabeth. If you don’t get it now—you never will.”

My heart pounds as I struggle to speak.

“I…I’m trying, Emma. I really am. But I feel the pain of my mistakes every single day.”

Emma’s eyes blaze with fire.

“You think that’s enough? Look at you! If your punishment had been real, you’d have no other choice but to face every mistake head-on!”

I press my trembling fingers together.

“I’m terrified of losing him. I don’t know if I can take that much suffering.”

Emma’s tone softens for a breath—then hardens again.

“Elizabeth, you had the chance to pay properly for what you did. But you got off too easy. And that pisses me off—not just for Adriel’s sake, but because I care too much to let you keep running from this.”

I nod slowly, tears burning at the edges of my vision.

“I do want to learn. I want to become someone worthy of him. But I’m stuck. If I suffer more, I might lose everything.”

Seda’s gentle voice cuts through the weight in my chest.

“Elizabeth, growth is messy. You have to accept pain in small doses, not all at once. You can learn without being crushed.”

I breathe in deep, heart aching with uncertainty.

“You know, Emma, if I were in your shoes, I’d demand something far harsher—I’d insist on suffering the consequences myself. But believe me, I’ve changed; I’ve grown; I recognize my mistake. I’ve already endured the harshest punishment: I hurt Adriel and nearly lost him.”

Emma stands up, eyes locked on mine.

“You can’t play it safe, Elizabeth. If you don’t learn through pain, you’ll never truly change.”

I look up at her, feeling exposed under her glare.

“Then what am I supposed to do? How do I learn without losing him—or destroying myself?”

Emma’s voice is cold. Unforgiving.

“From today on, I’m going to do everything I can to make your life difficult.”

The words hit me like a slap. I can barely breathe.

I know what she means: Emma is going to make sure I face the consequences. Every wrong move. Every second of neglect.

I stare at her—heart trembling with fear, and a strange flicker of hope crosses my eyes. Maybe this pain is the road to real change.

I want to change. For Adriel. For myself. But the idea of being reminded every day of my failures… it terrifies me.

For a long, heavy moment, I sit there, silent.

Then I nod, and the tears finally fall.