Life is a Mess Ever Since My Mother Won an Ero-Novel Grand Prize - V1 Epilogue- End of Vol 01

Epilogue

I met up with her in the morning in front of the Akihabara station for the first time in about two months. And the first thing she said to me was…

“Who’s the airhead heroine?”

“… Huh? What are you talking about?”

I knew what she meant, but I urged her onward with my hands in my pockets.

“Come on, let’s go with what we came here for. If we don’t, they might sell out.”

“That would be great, but if it were the other way around, it would be disastrous….”

“Please don’t say anything negative!”

Yes, today is a memorable day. After all, it’s the release date of “Giri-Gami,” the debut work of Mating Press.

Karin’s “Stardust” is also on sale today, which is why Rinka has asked me to go with her to buy it. Of course, it’s not a date.

But one day, I hope to be able to have a real date with her.

I can’t wait to make my debut as a writer, get dressed up, and confess my feelings to her.

There’s no guarantee that she’ll wait for me until then, but I won’t give up… both on my debut as a writer and on her.

“Well, it’s Animate, right?”

“… Wait a minute.”

“Hmm?”

When I turned around, I saw her face bright as red and she’s also holding out her hand for some reason.

“… Hand.”

“Hand? Something wrong with your hand?”

“No, I mean-!”

Rinka then shouted desperately.

“I said I’ll hold your hand!”!

I gasped and then…

“Eeeeeeeeeeeeeeehhhhhhhhh?”

 I screamed.

“What’s wrong with you? Are you ill?”

“Oh, Don’t get me wrong! You told me before that you’ve never even held hands with a girl. That’s not good for your future as a writer, so I’m offering to help you out, just because we’re fellow authors…”

“Are you okay with that?”

“U-urusai! What’s the big deal with holding hands together? You’re making too much of a fuss… It’s my first time with a boy…”

“Oh, you’ve never held hands with the opposite sex either?”

“Why are you making a fuss about it?”

I’m not… also don’t be so angry… So she wants us to hold hands probably because of some research? It might be a win-win situation for both sides, but… Is that a good idea?

“I will be the first one…”

In front of me, who was perplexed, Rinka kept her face down, whispering something to herself.

“Besides, the last time you canceled our trip to Akiba because of an emergency, you said you’d make it up to me… So hurry up and take my hand.”

“What does holding hands have to do with making up for that time?”

“Stop making it so awkward already…!”

She said with tears in her eyes and even her ears were red.

Anyway, Rinka and I were going to hold hands together.

Of course I was happy, why wouldn’t I? My heart is beating so hard.

But is it really okay? I’m not actually a fellow winner, so Rinka’s ” for fellow author’s sake” is actually wrong.

Besides, Rinka is the most beautiful girl in our school. She’s stylish, and so popular that she became hated. I know I’m not supposed to be a match for her but still…

Even today, she looks so cute…

“Hurry!”

Rinka turned her face away from me and stuck out her hand for me to take.

Her fingers were thin and soft, and her palm was beautiful,

Seriously, am I even allowed to do this…

But she seemed serious…

I thought it was unfair how she could do that.

While drenched in sweat, I reached for her hand.

However, there was a… problem.

“Haru-kuu〜〜〜〜〜〜n!”

“Geho!”

From the streets, Mirei rushed towards me with an air of desperation.

And then she took my hand that was supposed to be for Rinka – or rather, she sucked my arm in between her ample Breasts.

Squishy, squish.

Shocked, Rinka opened her mouth stupidly wide, as her hand wandered in the air.

Damn it, I can’t let myself look so pathetic in front of Rinka, of all people.

“Let go of me!”

I desperately tried to pull her off of me, but

“Haru-kun, help me! I was going to buy a copy of Giri-Gami, but they tried to make me do cosplay again. Akihabara is so scary!”

“How can that happen twice in a row?!”

Why does my mother always get into trouble everywhere she goes?

“Fuhen, Haru, please take your mother to the bookstore. I can’t do anything without you… Haru-kun~.”

“──Can’t do anything about it I guess…”

I hold my head in my hands, but I can’t leave her alone in this state.

“I’m sorry Rinka, but my mother needs company.”

“It’s okay. It’s okay. Hahaha…”

Rinka responded in a cold, dead voice.

“Oh, mother. I met you briefly during the results of the novel competition. I’m Rinka Takigami, Haruma-kun’s classmate.”

She bowed her head. My mother thinks you’re a little too formal to be a girlfriend because of that.

“I remember you, Rinka-chan. Come, Rinka, join us…”

“Eh?”

Mirei smiled and pulled Rinka closer…

Rinka was on her right, me on her left. Mirei, in the center, it’s like holding a flowers in each hand.

“Being sandwiched between two reliable people makes a mother feel safe!”

“…means you’re not gonna let your son in between us?”(E/N:Currently mirei is in the middle, squishing them, and it looks like Rinka wanted Haru to be in the middle.)

“No, I think it’s just to make sure that she won’t get lost…”(E/N:And yeahh, prob from experience but mc thought if mirei didn’t do this, she would probably get lost, idk why or how but yeahh.)

I don’t know which one of us is the parent anymore.

The three of us were walking in unison when we suddenly ran into a familiar face.

“G’mornin’, the Mating Press and Karin. And Mating Press’s Mom. This is me, “The country I’ve been focusing on lately is India,” Senri Ebidensu.”

“I don’t want to hear the name of your favorite country in the morning. It’s hard to be too conscious.”

“What do you mean, too conscious? You’re too naive?”

She’s still as loud as ever.

I don’t understand why this is the kind of woman I’m surrounded by.

But Senri was not alone. Today, she was walking with another person.

“Amazing, it’s a strange coincidence, Mating Press. It’s ‘A night I’ll never forget, with you,’ Kimeseku”

“You don’t need to go with the flow!”

Rinka, on the other hand, is on the verge of distress, “We’ve got another companion, hahaha”

Mirei smiled and said,

“You two seem to be getting along well.”

Then Senri an d Kimeseku-sensei giggled. And Kimeseku-sensei said, “We’re in the middle of family reconciliation.”

Thank you, Mating Press… That’s what his eyes were telling me, It’s because of you.

No, I didn’t do much to be honest. I just put the pieces back on the way they were supposed to be.

“Oh, really?”

The father and daughter looked very happy together.

“But it’s nothing more than that. We’re only parent and child, you know!”

“What do you mean?”

Senri, you should be careful with this. Your useless father loves his daughter so much that it looks like he will be in trouble.

“Mating Press…”

Senri said in a serious voice. When she called out, my mother and I simultaneously responded, “Yes?”, I then glared at Mirei. Then she gasped and said, “It’s nothing! I’m just a mother! I’m not a writer!” She hurriedly turned her head away.(E/N:Nice way to turn away suspicions there Mirei-chama.)

“What is it, Senri-san?”

“It’s true that I lost this time, but I didn’t lose to you. I lost to your family.”

“…I know.”

That story was not mine alone. It was me and my family’s story. That’s why the victory I got over Senri wasn’t a real accomplishment for me. It was a victory for the entire Shimomura family. If it was just me, I would never have beaten Senri.

“But next time, I won’t lose.”

Senri smiled fearlessly.

“Next time… I’m going to compete with my family, too!”

She then leaned over to Kimeseku-sensei and in response he lovingly strokes his daughter’s head.

“Mating Press… the strongest parent and child is not you guys, it’s us.”

They’re a powerful enemy. The god of light novels and the only daughter who followed his footsteps. There may not be a more powerful duo than these two. If they were to compete one more time, we might not even be able to come close to them.

But…

“We won’t lose.”

It wasn’t me, but my mother said.

“We’ll beat you back a hundred times, two hundred times, as many times as you want!”

These were powerful words. Anyone who would say those words and go this far against the god of light novels and his only daughter must be either a complete idiot or a complete genius. And I’m sure that my mother believes in the bonds of family more than anything else.

“You heard that? We will emerge victorious as many times as we want.”

I chuckled, and the two rivals laughed as well.

“That’s some nerve! I’ll be waiting for you!”

“Kuku, unfortunately, it will still be a while before you can get into bed with my daughter, Mating Press…! Muahahahaha!”

“Hey, Papa? What are you saying all of a sudden?”

Senri’s face turned bright red and she wilted, glancing at me with teary eyes.

“You know, Mating Press… that… my dad took the liberty to… but…”

Squirming, Senri seemed to want to say something, but was too embarrassed to do so.

On the other hand, Rinka was also astonished, and was in some kind of distress, “Another Rrrrr-rival…”

“I won’t hand over my daughter this easily! Understood!?”

Kimeseku-sensei took Senri’s hand and walked away.

“See you later, Mating Press!”

Senri waved her hand widely as she grew smaller and smaller.

“You’d better watch where you’re going, or you’ll get in trouble.”

Please don’t shout out obscene words in public. Mating Press…

Well, they were such a rowdy bunch.

And,

“You’ve got competition, Haru-kun.”

“Yeah, it’s too high a bar to set.”

A family competition, or… The other side might be the best father and daughter duo in Japan, and we might be no match for them.

I took a big step forward and moved on.

“Let’s beat them again.”

“Yes, you and your mother can do it!”

A fresh morning breeze blew through the air.

It would soon be summer. I looked up at the sky.

This time for sure…

“Don’t leave me here!” A few steps behind me were heard. 

Looks like Rinka chased after me. 

Then we went to Animate in Akihabara. It was located in a corner of a large department store.

The department store itself was open, but the Animate on the third floor was still closed. However, there were a lot of people there, and there was such a tense atmosphere, as if they were about to make a dash for the store once it opens.

“I wonder if they are all here for our work?”

“No, no way, mom…! That’s impossible…!”

As a writer, I’m sure it must be very moving to see your work in a bookstore.

 I could feel the excitement in the eyes of my mother and Rinka, who were standing next to me.

Although I’m only a substitute, it still feels special to see my mother’s and Rinka’s works. My sister, Miyuha, is also a part of this as the illustrator.

However, as if to violently dispel our thoughts, something very impressive was set up in the store.

That’s what everyone is looking for, right?

It was a tower made of hundreds of books stacked in a fashionable manner. It’s one of the performances that bookstore clerks do when a popular author releases a new work after a long absence.

“It’s amazing… some veteran author’s work was released today?”

“Our work won’t stand out at all with those.”

Both Rinka and I were overwhelmed, but only Mirei tilted her head,

“Wait a minute. That is…”

Then a bookstore clerk came out. With a megaphone in his hand, he began a grand PR campaign.

“Everyone, please take a look at 〜〜〜〜〜〜! Number one in the industry! The grand prize winner of the all-genre newcomer award, this time it’s a masterpiece, the masterpiece of masterpieces〜〜〜〜〜〜〜!”

Wooooooooooooooohoooooooooooooooooo

We all flinched at the sudden cheer.

What the hell is this?

“What’s going on?”

A nearby man called out to clear our confusion.

“Don’t you know? The two works that won the All Genre Newcomer’s Award this year were both heavily pre-ordered and went into reprint the day before. The first editions that are in the store right now will definitely fetch a high price!”

“The first edition! How is that possible?”

I’ve barely heard of same-day reprints, but a day before?

“Before a book goes on sale, it’s read by booksellers and critics, and based on their impressions, they decide how much to distribute. And this time, “Giri-Gami” and “Stardust” got the highest ratings! It’s the first time in history that anyone has been so satisfied with the results, and they’re still buzzing all over social media!”

“Oh, really…?”

We don’t do a lot of social networking, so we don’t really know what to expect.

The editorial department was probably too busy with the unexpected situation to get in touch with us and mention these things.

“And…”

He continued.

“It’s also a big deal that Kimeseku and Senri Ebidensu, known for their scathing reviews, are both praising it!”

“…!”

We had no more words.

A sixteen years old high school second-year student, whose pen name is “Mating Press”. He made his debut with his masterpiece, “Greek Mythologies” which skillfully depicts the passionate love between a mom and her son.

Seriously, I’ve got a hell of a lot of work to do…!

A bookstore clerk yells into a megaphone.

“To prevent resale, we’re limiting the number of books to five per person! Animate is now open!”

Whoa, whoa, whoa!

People rushed into the store in a festive atmosphere.

We were tangled up in the crowd and moved to a corner of the store to be on the safe side.

I had no idea this was going to happen…

I couldn’t help but be stunned.

The tower that the bookstore clerk had painstakingly built was coming down in no time at all.

“Five books for me!”

“I’ll take five, too!”

It was as if they were selling books at the market.

“Shimomura… look at this.”

Rinka shows me the screen of her smartphone. It seems to be Twitter.

“Tweets from people who’ve read it first in e-book form! There’s a huge storm of praise!”

─ “The mother is the cutest character! I’m glad to have found this work!” 

─ “Stardust” is also very tearful.

─ “I cried.”

─ “Giri-Gami” is the best. It’s too divine.

More and more tweets are coming in! 

How much of a hot topic is this novel becoming?

I can’t believe it…

But… It’s real.

It’s one of the biggest all-genre newcomer awards out there, and this time both winners were high school students, and there was also the buzz about the popular illustrator Sexy-Panty-Flash.

I knew it would attract a lot of attention, but I didn’t expect it to be this big!

Then my phone shuddered. It was a call from Hanagaki, my editor, “Hello Mating Press? I’m sorry, the editorial department is very busy right now! You may have already heard about the reprints, but anyway, congratulations! Looks like the printer might not be able to keep up with the production.”

How is that possible…

“Haru-ku──────n”

She grabbed my shoulders and shook them in excitement.

“Oh my God! Our story has been read by so many people! Everyone knows about our naughty secret, Haru-kun!”

“Don’t mix up fiction with reality!”

It was then. There was a customer who had heard it all too well.

“What, our secret? Come to think of it, the character designs of the mother and son in Giri-Gami look an awful lot like those two guys over there…!”

We were becoming nervous, 

But then, a wave of agitation spread through the room.

“Wow, they really do look like them!”

“You’re not just framing someone else, are you? I mean….”

“The two people who modeled, or was it the author? You’re telling me the author is here?”

“The author of “Giri-Gami” was advertised as a high school boy, right? So he must be…”

Uwooooooooooooooooooooooooo!!!

A crowd of people came this way! In no time at all, I was crammed up against the wall!

“Autograph, please!” “It’s cool no, it’s not cool at all!” “Is this your mom?!” “No way!” “She’s so pretty!” “Is this high school girl the author of Stardust?” “Oh, my God, she’s so beautiful!” “Sign, please!”

A lot of people crowded around, asking for autographs and having our pictures taken with their phones.

Everyone’s eyes were sparkling, it was too scary!　

“Fuhen, Haru-kun. Mommy is scared.”

“Hey Shimomura! Do something about this!”

“There’s no way I can do something!”

It was so crowded that people were overflowing out of the Animate, and even people passing by in the aisle were looking at us. 

And more,

“Hey, isn’t that Shimomura from the same class?”

“What? Why is there a classmate here?”

“What? His novel is for sale? Huh? Shimomura became a writer? That’s amazing! What kind of work is it? What’s his pen name?”

Uwwwwaaaaaa! This sucks! Everyone in school will find out!

And there was another familiar face.

“Oh? Isn’t that your neighbor, Shimomura-san?”

Ah! That’s the old lady from the neighborhood association? Why is she here?

“What? Her son is debuting as an author? That’s great! What kind of work does he do? What’s his pen name?”

Iyaaaaaaaaaaaaa! The neighbors will also know!

My head feels like it’s going to explode. I didn’t think I’d be exposed in an instant. 

They’ll think I’m the mother-con writer of the century! Dammit, in reality I’m nothing but a substitute.

Now Animate was in a state of festivity, with well over a hundred people packed tightly into the room.

The overwhelming clamor! The blazing heat!

It was like a live concert hall, and the cheers rang out as if it were the award ceremony three months ago. 

“Mating Press!!!” “Mating Press!!!”

Hahhh… My life has been a mess ever since my mother won the ero-novel grand prize!

TLN: Seriously I never had this much fun before translating a novel. Thank you author for writing this novel. Thank you everyone for reading. See ya all in the next volume. I’ll notify you guys once I start working on it, but for the time being let this novel bloom.