An Old Man Restaurant Owner Is Unparalleled by Relying on His Old Tricks. It Turns Out, He’s the Legendary Dungeon Conqueror. - 19

Chapter 19: Has There Ever Been a Dungeon Boss That Got Defeated in Such a Pitiful Way Before?

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The boss room was about the size of Shinjuku National Garden and the area consisted of beach and rocky areas with shallow seawater. Standing right at the water’s edge was a big crab monster that easily reached 20 meters long. 

“The boss of the Tachihi Dungeon is a King Death Crab. Please look forward to some delicious crab based dishes I will make after the boss fight.”

〈The lower levels boss is seen as nothing but an ingredient LOLOL〉

〈Now that he says it, it does look tasty.〉

〈Yeah, but the boss is supposed to be extremely brutal though LOLOLOLOL 〉

〈I mean, just look at that size. Imagine how much meat he can get out of it.〉

〈I want to see Miku-chan eats crab!〉

“So-So big…”

“So this is the boss of the lower levels… Indeed. The sheer pressure from it is completely different from middle level bosses…”

While Miku Kanamoto and Reika Kaga were in awe at the boss’ sheer size, I cast a barrier around them.

“This is…?”

“A barrier. This barrier will protect you in case the boss attacks you. Well, I’ll try to take it down before that happens though.”

I left the two behind and approached the King Death Crab.

“BURUUUUUU!!”

The boss was quick to notice me. It immediately let out a unique roar.

“Now then… Since we’re already here, I’d like to explain how to cook the King Death Crab while I fight it.”

I had encountered and defeated King Death Crab in another dungeon before. I tried to recall the details of my experience fighting it. Of course, I had eaten it back then too. I could still remember just how incredibly delicious it was.

〈I knew it. It’s always about food with him.〉

〈I mean, even if you explain it to us, it’s not like anyone can follow your advice.〉

〈Everyone!~ It’s time for a three minute cooking segment!~〉

〈That outer shell looks ridiculously hard though. How is he going to defeat it?〉

〈Knowing Nishida, he’ll probably just brute-force it with physical attacks.〉

The King Death Crab shot a high-pressure stream of water from its mouth. I quickly dodged it and the water cannon hit a nearby rock, destroying part of the rock.

“That water cannon attack is pretty painful, so it’s best if you avoid it. The water cannon is not that fast though. It’s easy to dodge and the King Death Crab has a pre-firing motion. It will wiggle its mouth before firing that water cannon. Just watch out for that animation attack and dodge accordingly.”

〈Pretty painful is a big understatement LOLOL〉

〈Besides, it’s ridiculously fast too. LOL〉

〈He makes that terrifying attack sound like an adorable squirt gun.〉

〈It’s almost like a mini tsunami.〉

〈It’s just water, but the pressure power is so terrifying depending on where it comes from, huh.〉

I continued to get closer to the crab while avoiding the water cannon attack when the monster started to spew bubbles from its mouth instead.

“These bubbles are not ordinary bubbles. It’s a special bubble that can traps anything that comes into contact with it. It’s best if you avoid it if you can.”

I deliberately touched one of the bubbles to get my point across and I was instantly sucked into it.

“But there’s no need to panic if you get accidentally trapped into one like this. You can just destroy the bubble by hitting it a bit.”

BANG!!

I gave the bubble a light kick and the bubble immediately busted open.

〈That’s definitely not a ‘bit’.〉

〈※ Kids, don’t try this at home.〉

〈Nishida, what if a kid actually tries it?〉 

〈Stop making weird complaints.〉

〈I want to have kids with God-Oldman.〉 

〈Another creepy one.〉

“Things are getting easier now that you’ve got close to it. The crab will attack you with its pincers, but as you can see… The crab is a bit big, so you can easily dodge the attack.”

I said while dodging the pincers and the pincers got stuck into the sand with a loud sound.

〈The heck. That is way too fast for normal people.〉 

〈It’s like having a truck charge toward you at 100 km/h.〉 

〈That boss monster is anything but ‘bit big’ LOL〉 

〈If it were me, I would’ve been split into two. Hii~〉

“And then, you need to target the joints. The shell is softer around there. You cut the limbs one by one, just like this.”

“BURU-?!”

I sliced the boss’ joints with a kitchen knife one by one and its massive body collapsed to the sand with a big thud.

〈All its legs were taken out just like that…〉 

〈So merciless…〉 

〈Poor Crab-san…〉 

〈Nishida, you should’ve gone a bit easy on that poor crab.〉 

〈No, but, what’s with that knife? There’s not a single chip on that blade after slicing through all that legs?!〉 

〈I really want to know what that kitchen knife is made of.〉

“Now, let’s flip it over.”

BAMMM!!

I kicked the shell and the boss was turned onto its back.

〈That kick was too strong. lol〉 

〈I know it’s just shell part, but that must be super heavy.〉 

〈Is this really a lower level boss…?〉 

〈The boss our party fought with our lives on the line is taken down this easily…〉 

〈Is there any explorer aiming to clear the lower level watching this livestream?〉

“And now, we’ll remove this ‘loincloth’ part on the underside of the crab.”

On the underside of the crab, there was a triangular part known as the “loincloth.” I sliced through the joint that kept it together and…

“Now that the ‘lointcloth’ part is gone, we can start tearing it off. You don’t need to exert too much force for this part.”

CRACK CRACK CRACK!!!

〈Hiiiiiiii!!!〉

〈That definitely requires a lot of strength.〉 

〈It looks painful.〉 

〈You know, you guys also do the same thing as him when you guys eat a crab.〉 

〈Now, now, don’t compare us to Nishida. The mere sound alone is on a completely different level.〉

“Next, we’ll remove the shell. The shell is heavy, so you need to exert a lot of force here. Oh, look. There’s a lot of delicious crab miso inside. Alright. Finally, we need to remove the gills and with that, we’ve finished preparing the crab. We can start cooking it now.”

Panpaka panpaka paaaaan♪

〈What’s that sound?〉 

〈The sudden upbeat melody after that whole spectacle is hilarious. LOL〉

An upbeat melody could be heard echoing throughout the whole area. This was actually one of the sound effects that occurred when a dungeon was cleared. Not only this sound could be heard on the inside the dungeon, but also outside the dungeon. With this, everyone around the dungeon would know that the dungeon had been cleared. 

“It seems the boss died during the preparation process.”

〈This is my first time witnessing a dungeon being cleared.〉 

〈I’m a bit touched.〉 

〈No, I don’t think anyone can feel touched from this. LOL〉 

〈The boss’s dignity is nowhere to be seen.〉 

〈Has there ever been a dungeon boss that got defeated in such a pitiful way before?〉

Near the entrance of the dungeon, there was some sort of monument with star epigraphs. The stars showed how many times the dungeon had been cleared. That monument had 5 stars before I entered the dungeon, but now that I had cleared the dungeon, the sixth stars should appear on that monument. 

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T/N: I never dissected a raw crab before so I don’t know about the ‘loincloth’ part or whatever. Also that one viewer who wants to have kids with Nishida??? Po-Police??? Keisatsu???? (˚☐˚”)/(”˚☐˚)/